Gifts that rule the world

However many shopping days to go, and all that.  The weekend papers fill up with more supplements of presents to buy that promise to help you control your kitchen, your bathroom, cats that visit your garden.

Meanwhile, Lakeland continues to attempt to take over the universe…or at least, tries to add to the prospect of taming chaos, all with a nice biscuit to hand.

I have a slightly love-hate relationship with Lakeland (formerly Lakeland Plastics).  I suspect quite a lot of women do.

One of the Times columnists who writes in the T2 supplement during the week confessed her excitement, earlier in the year, at the latest catalogue arriving – and how many of her friends she would then have Lakeland discussions with.  Another friend on Facebook seems to have a fairly similar reaction.

What is it about Lakeland? They are clearly doing something right, yet a bit different, with ever more stores opening up, yet still none in central London, for example.  I should be properly grateful that Edinburgh is considered nice enough to have a store – along with other gentle (or is that genteel?) destinations like Bath, Canterbury and York.

I’m told that the customer service over the phone is second to none, though the ladies who police the Edinburgh store tend to be slightly on the officious side, on the whole.

And this, it seems, is how Lakeland divides – as well as conquers.  As does the list of products.  Because for every item that seems over fussy and controlling, or rather too twee, there are some tremendous ones that find you circling items, or even, bending down the page too, so that the male of the household might find them and respond appropriately.

No to tea bag squeezers.  To washing up gloves with very long sleeves.  To water carafes with matching glasses painted with spring flowers.  But yes to yoghurt makers, silicone baking tins, to sets of stacking bowls that get constant use.  And they are very good at adding new products, so you have to look at the next catalogue…hmmm.

The bit that confuses me more is where kitchen items, cleaning items, are not enough – Lakeland must also be the first thought when you want to buy craft materials, or, now, toiletries, and other items that Boots would probably prefer to monopolise.

I’m not sure what their main age range demographic is for customers, but clearly, they are very sure that their customers want to be clean, tidy, good at thoughtful presents, and at times, creative too.

What interests me is that you’re not being sold just one lifestyle, as you are with a lot of other brands or stores.  But I do think that, ultimately, Lakeland conspires to sell you products to make you feel that some things are working properly in a few key parts of life – perhaps a very female wish, and part of the reason for their success.

It’s not just men that want new gadgets.  It’s just that they don’t seem to need as many ‘inverted commas’ statements in the advertising copy to encourage them to do so.

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